Where is the Hope?

I am a notoriously nostalgic person.

My mind relishes the past and it's hard for my heart to catch up to where my physical body is. I replay memories like my favorite movie. I think that's why I take so many photos... for the memories. So that when I'm old and grey, I'll have something to remember. It's why I write so much, so as to remember the feelings.

I love the past because it's a good benchmarker for how far the Lord has brought me. Gosh, has He carried me through so much. There is a collection of benchmarker moments for me when I need to remember certain things about God. I can recall them off the top of my head should I ever need a reminder that God is real. He is faithful. He is good. 

I get overwhelmed sometimes with the story He's given me. I see His fingerprints all over my life, and I'm thankful. It makes me wonder about my sweet friends who don't know Him in the same way I do. 

Where is the hope? Where is the purpose? 

I went on a trip to the beach recently with some friends from work, and one night we were talking about our greatest fears (mine is quite literally childbirth for anyone wondering). One of the fears that everyone circled around was not living out their purpose, maybe not even knowing their purpose. My heart broke for them and how scary that must feel. I wish I could give them the Hope that I've found as easily as taking their hands in mine and wrapping their fingers around it. 

Sometimes I wonder if I'm doing enough to share that with them without shoving it in their face. The daily rhythms of the gospel in action sometimes feels so slow. I want the honest conversations that are intentional and sometimes hard and awkward. I'm not going to tell someone how to live their life, but sometimes I wish I could you know? Is that wrong to say, probably. I just think I've reached a point where I've realized that my way is never better. I trust God more than I trust myself; a lesson I've learned through a slew of mistakes. But again, I guess I never would have learned until going through it. It just hurts me to see people I love walk through unnecessary heartbreak when I feel like I'm holding on to a Hope that will save them.