Better

For the person who feels like their timing is off, I know how you feel.

But I believe more than anything it's not.

There's a million words out there on God's timing and His plan, my own included. But I felt like I needed to write this for the person who feels like nothing is going according to plan.

I was that girl. Sometimes I am still that girl. But as I continue through life clinging to the arm of God, I am learning that I am exactly where I need to be. As I continue to pry my fingers from my own plans for my life, I am learning what it means to live a life of faith.

I wanted to be married as soon as I graduated from college. 'Tis very normal for my southern friends, while everyone else might call me a child bride. It has always been a dream of mine to start a family and be the stay-at-home mom that my own mom was. I wanted this more than anything. More than a career, more than money or success.

But here I am a year out from my graduation, living in Orlando... alone, but full to the brim of faith that God is providing for me in ways I never expected. I would not have my career with Disney, my small business, or the people in my life that I do if I hadn't said yes to what the Lord asked of me.

The more I let God's timing play out in my life, the more convinced I am that it's way better than mine. I've always heard that in church or even just inspirational quotes on Facebook, but it wasn't until recently that I actually started believing it. 

So much of my life is made up of moments I couldn't have created for myself, but have come together through divine orchestration. From the exact moment that God led me to LSU, I met my friend Chandler who convinced me to do the Disney College Program. I did two college programs while in school which was my resumé's only pride and joy, as I was a TERRIBLE student. The CP's gave me a professional internship with Disney, which has turned into my home and career. Says the girl who never wanted a thriving career and has never known what to do with her life.

It has been so crazy to see how God has been preparing me for this season before I even knew it; and to think I've only scratched the surface of my story.

There is a certain freedom that comes with releasing my own plans with faith that I will be better because of what God has for me. It makes me fearless. Looking back on my short 23 years, there are some hard things I definitely wouldn't have chosen for myself. But I am alive and better because of them. There are some good things I would have given myself, but God withheld because He had better. He has given me a reason to trust that I can take risks and I can fall down, and be more than okay on the other side. 

I hope you live with that kind of fearlessness. Sure, hard things are kind of the worst in the moment. I know these words and stories don't hold a ton of weight for someone in the trenches of loneliness or hurt or disappointment. No one is arguing that life is hard and will continue to be hard as long as we are on this earth. The fact that it gets better eventually doesn't always fix what is happening in the heart now. I get that, and I hope you don't feel rushed to feel something that you don't; but my prayer is that hope would live in your heart. 

Hope that life is made up of seasons; and seasons don't last forever.

Hope that God is near in every moment.

Hope that He saw this coming, and that nothing is unexpected for him.

Hope that it will all be okay. That you will be okay.

I'm sure I will say this a million times more in my lifetime, but as of now I have never been more confident that God's timing is better. It is perfect, even when we can't see it. I hope you choose to believe that in the now, without waiting to see the big picture. We don't have to know the whole story to know that He is good. 

How beautiful would it be if we could look hard things straight in the face with light in our eyes, hope in our hearts, and trust that we will make it to the other side better than we were before.