I am a person who has to do things herself.
I will not ask for help. I don't
like asking for help.
I can prove that I am strong enough, smart enough, capable enough... just
enough to do things on my own.
I hate googling actors that I recognize in movies but can't place, because I know I can command my mind to remember this trivial piece of information.
I hate going to SI sessions for school work, even if I'm struggling in the class.
I won't even take medicine when I'm feeling sick because I somehow figure I can get over it myself. I'm ridiculous, I know.
These little examples of my obsession with self-sustenance are funny and make you shake your head and distantly question my sanity. But what I've been noticing is the way these little things translate into bigger things that affect my relationship with Christ.
Sometimes we unconsciously get in the habit of keeping personal life and spiritual life separate, when really they should be intertwined. Too often I hear of students feeling overwhelmed by school work or stressed about this relationship or that friendship. We are in tune with God during life group and church and worship, but then when it comes to school or social life, it can be easy to set God in the background.
